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Saturday, February 7, 2015

Foster Care in Texas

Ok, I have a few things I need to get off my chest.  I have been working in foster care for the last year and a half and there are a few things all current and prospective foster parents need to know that your CPA (child placing agency) isn't going to say to your face.  But seriously- you need to know these things.

1. If you are adoption motivated and you want a baby, foster care is not for you.
I mean yes it does happen, but chances are that it won't.  Just save all your pennies and get a baby from a straight adoption agency.  Foster care isn't the place to build your perfect little dream family. The kids we get have been seriously abused and neglected and they come with a healthy set of issues, even if they are straight out of the womb. And news flash:  If you do get a baby placed with you, don't count on getting to adopt it- reunification is always CPS' number one goal.

2. If you have specific preferences about how your child should look, foster care is not for you.
Let me repeat myself:  Foster care isn't the place to build your perfect little dream family. If you want a child with brown hair and blue eyes, dimples, and a button nose, then what you NEED is a reality check. While we're at it-you don't get to say "no" to having a black child placed with you. That makes you racist, and we don't want to work with racists.  I don't care if your family is racist but you aren't. You are a fucking adult. Stop hiding behind your mommy as an excuse. You're a racist asshole, and maybe you shouldn't be raising children to begin with.

3. If you recieve a placement and you don't think its a good fit, that's totally fine. Foster care probably isn't for you.
I know what you're thinking- But maybe it just isn't a good fit?  Maybe the child placed with us breaks things and hurts the other children in my home?  Maybe the child is into everything and he flooded the bathroom by running the tub?  Maybe the child acts out sexually and it makes me uncomfotable!  You know what?  I can see why you'd have an issue with all of the above; but all of the above are going to happen. Let me repeat myself:  Foster care isn't the place to build your perfect little dream family.

4. Foster care is for you if-
-You are willing to provide a stable, nuturing, caring environment for any child who needs one, regardless of the child's age, race, or gender.
-You are willing to work with the child through the issues that they are going to have, and will be bringing with them into your home.
-You are doing this for them and not you.



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