Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Reasons why the British aren't as smart as they think they are.

1. They judge age based on height.  This phenomenon is something I have experienced first hand. I am 5'10 and have been since the tender age of 12. 99% of the the time when entering a bar or purchasing alcohol, no one bothers to ID me, however they will ID my peers who (no offence) are clearly my age or older. When questioned about this policy every single bouncer/cashier replied with "She's short."

2. They think they know everything about America.  Ok brits-or world for that matter; You may have seen every Hollywood blockbuster since 1985, You may know all about our electoral system and our foreign policy, You may have even been to LA, New York, or Vegas, but TRUST ME you've barely scratched the surface of American culture and life. To assume that you know everything there is to know about a place after popping in a DVD, googling the Bush Doctrine and spending a week and a half gambling and drinking in a dimly lit casino makes you an ignorant, pompous, ass.

3. They claim they own the English Language (and America is ruining it). First of all-English was originally a Germanic Language spoken in Germany and the British stole it, much like they took Scotland, Northern Ireland, India, and Hong Kong. Then a bunch of other Germanic influences came and changed things up, and the English language underwent a make over.  Then it underwent another makeover when the British got cozy with the Scandinavians. English is great because it evolves. It SURVIVES because it evolves. The fact that Americans (and Canadians, and New Zealanders, and Australians, and Scottish, and Irish) speak English and put their own spin on it is a good thing. If we didn't speak English, you might actually have to learn another language yourself, and just think what a hassle that would be!

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